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The Truth Of Manipulation - Why BTC fair value is $0

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Hi guys, back from the jungles of Belize where I performed my 100th ayahuasca ritual. I have come to some, I think, very valuable revelations which may come in handy to you in the months to come. THE BITCOIN MARKET IS MANIPULATED!!! George Soros manipulated the coin up and now once he’s successfully distributed, it will find a new equilibrium at 0 once it’s banned for causing so much damage.

Truth is, a couple of days ago I got liquidated and had to sell my house (which also so happens to serve as my mode of transportation) as well as all of my worldly possessions. The only reason I can warn you now is that I’ve been spiking coffees At Starbucks with laxatives all morning and finally some dumb hipster asked me to watch his stuff while he evacuates his bowels. He even left his bank account logged in but he’s worse off than me if you can believe ($2500 over-drafted), and I haven’t even introduced him to Bitmex yet!

The reason for my insights is that it doesn't matter which direction trade you take, the price will momentarily gravitate towards your stop orders to maximise Soros’ profitability. I have therefore concluded that with my last $100, I shall go in an opposite direction: no direction. What does that mean? With my last $100, I shall go 100x short AND long; yes, that's zero risk and infinite potential. I thought I was wrong, or crazy but the ayahuasca elves confirmed that my calculations were in fact correct. My psychedelic meditation has lead me to this exact point to become the world’s first trillionaire, probably by the end of next year so take your autographs while you can!

Thanks for reading, the elves also told me that Prince Andrew is guilty, but not in the way you think. He was getting the kids to feed his reptilian mother.
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Ok guys, the elves were wrong, its 100% risk and 0% reward, i got liquidated in both accounts :( how could the government let this happen to me? Im not a bad trader, this is manipulation! I would have a 100% strike rate if it wasnt for MANIPULATION! I deserve a refund this instant. I challenge Soros to a one on one trading competition, but no cheating this time ;). Pm me bro or be forever branded as a pussy.
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